Still dreaming

Been there, done that

Still dreaming of my bike trip.

But it was Mom yesterday and today.

She had a lot of attention when Son E and Sister S were in town. Was delighted with the boy: "He's so nice!" And he is.

Yesterday she seemed lovely and energetic compared to some of her bedraggled companions. The caregivers often put a little tasteful makeup on her and choose earrings that match her outfit -- a nice touch. We went downstairs and got her mail from the front desk and sat in the Bistro and went over it over coffee. It's all pretty much bills and junk, but she likes to hear my general explanations before concurring with me that we can throw most of it out.

I was startled yesterday, though, when she suddenly said, "Jon. It's just coming to me that your dad died."

"Yeah, Mom. He died four years ago."

She looked at me with big eyes. "I don't remember anything about it. I wasn't there."

"You were there, Mom. All the time."

She thought a bit. "I wonder if I was in Norway with the St. Olaf Choir when Dad died."

"No, you were there. In Ann Arbor. Do you remember him in the bedroom?"

"I was there?"

"You were there."

*

Today, church. We had a substitute preacher, a distinguished man with a rich beard wearing a huge kimono-like robe. He explicated a confounding parable and I liked it.

Mom can't quite follow a hymn lately, unless it's an old familiar one. She gets the Lord's Prayer pretty well.  We did communion, and then, at the end of the service, she shook the pastor's hand and said "Happy Easter."

Manitowoc

Days away

Kohler-Andrae State Park, Sheboygan 

We were up in Door County last week, and Friday to Sunday I biked home, 190 miles in three days. It was tough, much of it, as I am in no kind of shape. But fun. Sister L was here on the weekend, and I went over to St. John’s on Labor Day for the outdoor picnic with Son E, and Wednesday for Move and Groove. Mom seems more expressionless than ever, and it’s hard to tell what she’s taking in. At the picnic, she said, “I just feel lost,” and at Move and Groove, when it was taking a while to get everybody corralled, she said, “Let’s get going” and hitched forward and tried to start it herself. E has been making  daily visits — even Thursday’s singalong, the whole of it — which is a big help.

I’ve been sick and bedridden for two days, sleeping most of the time. Sore throat, plugged face. I’m staying away from SJ today so I don’t kill anybody. Julie will bring some flowers from the farmer’s market this afternoon. Tomorrow I’ll see about church. Julie’s mom and cousin Paulie are coming for church and brunch, and I’ll just wait and see about that, too.  

I think this month I will be moving to half-time at work. There’s a lot of change and upheaval there — people leaving, new software, new paper configurations, designers in Des Moines — and the extent to which it was fun is much diminished. But, in any case, this is something I’ve been hoping for and it will get me back to doing more of what I like to do.

Still life with food bag and helmet

Nylon coffin